Janine Langdon-Lee
  • Home
  • Work With Me
  • Books
  • Blog
  • Connect

162.7 Reasons

/ Body, Health & Wellbeing, Self Care, Self Love

When you ignore something long enough – it’s only a matter of time before you are forced to deal with it whether you like it or not. I hope that in sharing my story, it will help someone else realise it’s never too late to rewrite a chapter in your life.  

Start where you are

I will always remember that moment when the nurse asked me to step onto the scales. I hadn’t weighed myself in a year, so I had no clue what weight I was. I stepped onto the scale with some trepidation, I watched as the number appeared in front of me – 162.7 kilograms. I burst into tears – how had I let this happen? No wonder I had felt disconnected from my body. As Mike comforted me, I felt ashamed of myself. I left the appointment, overwhelmed.  You can read more about sleep apnoea in these two posts that I wrote here and here.  I was confronted by the realisation that I needed to stop burying my head in the sand and sort my shit out and address the weight.  I knew I could turn this around as I had with my relationship with exercise, I just had to start now and make some small changes, and over time it would create significant changes in my life. At 49 years old, I knew if I didn’t start now, I would spend my 50’s feeling fat and frumpy. Damn it I wanted to be 50, Fit and Fabulous & fierce.

I knew I couldn’t do this on my own, and I needed help. I talked to Mike about the different options. I had checked out several options. Although in the past, I had said I didn’t need an eating plan, I didn’t want to count points or restrict what I was eating or be on any diet. My weight gain indicated that I couldn’t self-moderate what I did eat.

Mike and I on my birthday March 2019
Mike and I – March 2019

I decided that out of the options I had explored that WW was the way to go. I joined up for three months to see how I would go within that time, and if I saw some progress I would keep on doing it, and if I didn’t then, I would try something else. WW had changed a lot since I last did the programme 25 years ago.  You can now do WW online, which is what I chose as the meetings times didn’t suit me, and to be honest, the shame of my weight made me feel embarrassed about attending a meeting.

On the 22nd of February, I downloaded the app, entered my age, weight and height, and how much exercise I do, and it came up with my daily points and weekly points that I would start on. The app was pretty amazing as I would find out. It tells you the points for foods and meals and recipes on there. It has a barcode scanner where you can scan products from your pantry or freezer or in the shopping aisle of your supermarket. If the food doesn’t show up, you can calculate the item, and it will tell you how many points per 100-gram serving. You track your weekly weigh in using the app, and you can enter the type of exercise you have done and for how long and it allocates points for your activity. There are also exercise plans you can do on there as well. I track my activity; however, I don’t do it for points, I do it because I need to move every day whether it is doing housework walking or yoga. The app also has an online place where you can connect with other members online and be inspired by their stories, progress and ups and downs of their journey and share recipes and tips etc. I learnt a lot by reading other members posts.  The only downside of not going to a meeting is having someone explain how it all works. It took me a few days to work it all out and realise that I could create my eating plan and how the elements of the app worked. However, they send you regular emails about topics that they discuss in meetings, and they have an online shop so you can buy WW products, recipe books etc. However, you can speak to an online coach if you have questions or ask a member on Connect.

I found the first week relatively easy. I never felt hungry or that I was going without as the end of the first week approached my first weigh-in was looming. I was curious. My first weigh-in, I lost 5.1 kg. I was in shock! I hadn’t expected to lose so much in the first week. I wasn’t hungry at all, and I ate well.

At Aston Norwood
Me at Aston Norwood 28 Sep 2019
Photo by Monica Ferguson

It not always about the number

There were weeks where my weight stayed the same, and I would become frustrated; however, during those weeks, I would remind myself of the non-scale victories that I had that week. Over the last nine months, I have had many NSV’s to celebrate, such as;

  • A two week cruise holiday in which I lost 200 grams
  • Dropping clothes sizes
  • Being able to sit in chairs and not worry if I will hold my weight
  • More energy
  • Exercise is getting easier to do
  • Back pain that had been there for a year has gone
  • Lower cholesterol levels
  • Letting the cleaners go and cleaning the house myself
  • Spending more time in the kitchen cooking recipes from scratch
  • Not gaining or losing weight on a one week holiday in Hawaii
  • New habits
  • No longer seeing food as good or bad – it is food
  • My body shape changing
  • Falling in love with myself again

This health and wellbeing journey is the longest I have been active and the most weight I have lost, what has helped me to edit this chapter of my life, is focussing on small steps and putting one foot in front of the other. Getting clear on my WHY at the start of my journey was helpful. It gave me focus and was always in the back of my mind.  I journaled how I wanted to feel during my journey, and I would refer back to these notes regularly. Instead of looking at the big picture I focused on losing 5 kilos. Mikes support helped as well as reading other members posts on Connect. I realised that WW is a lifestyle change.

Mike and I Nov 2019
Mike and I November 6 2019
Photo by Monica Ferguson

Where to now?

Another part of my success has been the people cheering me on from the sidelines. Initially, the only people I told about my weight were the people I saw for my exercise. I didn’t mention to friends what I was doing as I still felt ashamed. I am not sure how or when or what caused the change. However, I began to confide in a few friends that I was doing WW. As of this Friday, I weigh 123 kilos.  I am no longer pre-diabetic. I have asked to be referred back to the sleep clinic for a sleep study so see where my sleep symptoms are sitting. I have a weight range I want to get too. It is somewhere between 85 to 95 kilos. According to the BMI, I will still be obese, however, I don’t give a crap about that. I need to be realistic about a weight that I can maintain. According to the BMI to be a healthy weight, I have to get down to 55 kilos. The last time I weighed that I was in my teens. Being 55 kilos is not realistic for me.  My focus is my next goal-reaching 40 kilos. I can’t think that far ahead otherwise I will get caught up in overwhelm.

woman standing holding cup in hands
Me – Nov 2019 Photo by Monica Ferguson

On Reflection

The appointment on the 20th of February, 2019 was a turning point for me. I had a decision to make. I could keep ignoring my weight gain (look where that had gotten me already) or I could make changes that would benefit my health and wellbeing. I told myself when I was ready I would share my story and hopefully, it may help someone else who is struggling with something in their life, to show that small consistent steps/actions can create ripples of change in your life. It’s never too late to start.

Thank You, Monica Ferguson, for the gorgeous photos you took of me. If you are looking for a fantastic photographer check out Monica, she will guide you through the shoot and make it fun for you. Let her capture your magic in an image.

Filed Under: Body, Health & Wellbeing, Self Care, Self Love

Pin Share Share

Comments

  1. Mrsfrizz says

    November 22, 2019 at 8:41 pm

    You are inspirational my friend. Congratulations ❤️

    • neen says

      November 23, 2019 at 12:44 am

      Thanks, Mrs F. It’s my why that has made me keep at this and the programme, its a lifestyle and it has helped me change my attitude towards food.

  2. Debbie Blincoe says

    November 22, 2019 at 11:06 pm

    You are amazing! You are such an inspiration – I’m really re starting WW and weighed in this morning at 158kg.

    • neen says

      November 23, 2019 at 12:42 am

      Thank You, Debbie, for your kind words. Congrats – you are awesome! You have got this!

👉Okay am going old school & showing my age! 

👇My fav cartoon was👇

 "The Jetsons"....anyone else remember that? 

👇Share with me your fav in the comments👇

⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself⁠
and if you truly like the company you keep⁠
in the empty moments.⁠
⁠
-Oriah Mountain Dreamer⁠
⁠
💕When you are alone with only your thoughts for company, how does that make you feel? Six years ago I felt uncomfortable with mine so I would distract and suppress my thoughts with food.⁠ ⁠I now know I did this to protect myself from pain and discomfort. I didn't want to feel. ⁠
⁠
💕Two years ago when I began the Nourish part of my health and well-being journey, I had to learn to sit with my thoughts, feelings and emotions. At times this was and still is messy.⁠ 
⁠
💕The reality is I will struggle with this. Food was my emotional comfort blanket for six years and it wasn't going to be a quick fix to change.⁠
⁠
💕I still have moments where I stumble.  This happened to me recently. In the scheme of things it was a drop in the ocean compared to what I used to do. That in itself was an achievement. ⁠
⁠ 
💕 I have made peace with this and the biggest lessons I took from this last speed wobble was to:⁠
⁠
Forgive myself⁠
Get back on track⁠
Don't give up⁠
Nurture myself⁠
⁠
💕After all as they say - "Progress not Perfection"⁠

How do you dust yourself off after a setback? 
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
💖Advice to my younger self would be this!⁠
⁠
👇👇👇⁠
⁠
When we begin and start off on a good note we can reap the benefits at the end. I would also tell her that she didn't have to race to get to the end either! She is exactly where she needs to be right now.⁠
⁠
What would you share with you younger self?⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
🏃‍♀️Saturday I am coming for you! 👉I 🏃‍♀️Saturday I am coming for you! 

👉I now know after 2.5 years that fitness is not about being better than someone else, it’s about being better than you used to be!

🏃‍♀️Have a great Saturday lovelies. I am off to Pilates reformer class with a 30 minute circuit class via zoom later this morning followed by a massage in the afternoon. 

💕What are your plans for today?
💕At 49, I knew if I didn't start now, I would s 💕At 49, I knew if I didn't start now, I would spend my 50's feeling fat and frumpy! Damn it, I wanted to be 50, Fit, Fabulous & Fierce! ⁠
⁠
💕It was never about a number, it was a desire to feel good within myself. At 52 I can say I do love and value who I am.  A feeling that has seen me come home to myself. ⁠
⁠
💕Changes to your life don't have to be big transformative things, even the smallest changes can create ripples in your life.⁠
⁠
📝I began self-editing my SWYA (Start Where You Are) book again this week. I want to launch this book into the world in July. I was reminded how these four pillars were the foundation of my journey of self-discovery, love and worth. ⁠
⁠
👉Hit "save" so you can come back to this post
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
👉We grow through change! ⁠👈 ⁠ 💕At the 👉We grow through change! ⁠👈
⁠
💕At the age of 49 and 50 fast approaching I was  increasingly aware that I was in a state of transition and change was looming. ⁠
⁠
💕Maybe you have experienced this too whether it's children leaving home, or a relationship ending, a move to a new city or the end of a job or a health and wellbeing crisis.  Add to the mix being peri-menopausal or entering menopause and we find ourselves wondering about life and soul searching.⁠
⁠
💕For me it was craving a deeper connection with my feminine self. I realise this feeling was my soul’s way of getting my attention. To guide me back into alignment from pushing and sacrificing my own needs in order to meet the demands of others to feeling empowered, connected, supported and confident within myself. ⁠
⁠⁠
💕After suppressing my feminine energy for decades, this was a slow awakening. As I began to embracing her, she in turn, helped me reconnect to soul and transform my inner life which created ripples into my outer life. ⁠
⁠
💕If you are a mid life woman I’d love to hear your thoughts about what I wrote or the challenges you are facing in the comments, or lets chat in the DMs.⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
Connect on Instagram
  • Facebook
  • Instagram

© 2019 Janine Langdon-Lee | Website by Form & Flourish

×